July 8, 2014

Halfway Nuts.

There was a time in my life when I loved camping.  I would go camping every summer in Gardiner with the fam and LOVED it.  It was the 70's, we slept in a tent, on the ground and Ma cooked toast over the campfire.  Those were some of my favorite memories growing up.  Even though there was that time when my arm was in a cast and a rooster attacked me on the merry go round.  Or that time when I was on my way to the store to buy wax bottles and a spider chased me down the path.  Or that time when Richard the gander bit me on the cheek.  Gee...no wonder why I'm afraid of birds and spiders. 

There was a time in my life where I loved NOT camping.  I would rather sleep in a fluffy bed, take a real shower, eat in a restaurant and shave my legs.  I didn't think about camping.  I lived in Vegas.  If I travelled anywhere, I'd book a hotel room.  A tent was the furthest thing from my mind.

Funny how life comes back around.  Like how we all should have kept our clothes from the 80's because we'd be back in fashion several times over by now.  Now I love camping again. It started a couple of years ago when I bought a tent from my friend, Laura.  That purchase set off the madness and shopping at the Coleman Outlet became fun. There was a time when shopping at DSW or Gap was fun.  Now, I can't wait until the end of the month when I can sleep in a tent, shower in flip flops, eat smores and have no wifi.  Crazy, right? I have no idea where all my shoes are but I do know where my camping stove is.  Sigh.

I'm still vintage, like back in the 70's.  No, I'm not talking about 'landscaping'....I keep that in check. I'm talking about sleeping in a tent.  That's real camping to me.  Who knows? Maybe one day I'll want to upgrade to an RV.  Like..when I can't pick my old ass up off the tent floor. 

Speaking of getting old.  I wonder if I'll be one of those old ladies that sit in their easy chair watching 'Wheel for Fortune'.  I doubt it because I'm still pissed at them for not picking Bill & I for the show.  Psh.  We would have rocked that wheel AND made the show fun but whatever.  Screw you, Pat Sajak.  I'm watching the 'Price is Right'. Anyway.  I wonder if I'll have a bunch of cats and be bat shit crazy, too.  I kind of hope so.  I think that'd be really fun.

In my head, though, I'm going to be a cool ass grandma who wears hats, funky clothes & a lot of jewelry.  Who spends all her time outside with her grandkids playing, exploring & creating and when inside, making cookies, coloring & drinking tea.  Yea.  That's the old lady I want to be.

I'm pretty sure that I'll be slightly nuts and Abe & Amanda will forget me in a lawn chair outside where I'll sit for hours in some world of my own making. I'm obviously feeling old today.  Like premenopausal old.  Blah. Or maybe I'm already halfway nuts.

So, does anyone know why Google thinks it knows what I'm looking for?  And, does anyone know why Google thinks I'm a retard?  I swear.  I could type 'Where is' and get a plethora of crazy things that I already know where they are or would never want to know where they are?  Are these things people are asking?  Albeit  ALOT of people?  So much so that 'Where am I?' comes up?  Are there that many people who don't know where they are?  Ugh.  And I'm a blonde.

I'm tired.  Of paying bills I can't afford, of working so much I'm missing summer and of eating nothing but gaining weight.  Maybe I've spent my whole life under the misconception that life was meant for having fun, doing what you love, loving what you do, having adventures and being happy.  Why the hell didn't anyone tell me life was hard?!?! haha!

Oy vey. Anyway...back to work.  I've got nonsense to do. 


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