November 19, 2013

Mostly Dead is Slightly Alive.

I started working again. After 6 months of unemployment, I have to say....I've gotten used to sleeping late, nap time, doing what I want. Working kind of sucks.

But, until I hit lotto or marry a rich Dr, it's something I have to do it. Sigh. 

So, to make up for the fact that I am no longer 'free' and have to answer to 'the man', I find humor.  Always. With everything. In every situation. I find humor....because if I don't, I won't survive.  No, seriously, I won't. I'm convinced that the moment I don't find some glimpse of humor in life, I will be mostly dead.

Luckily for me, new job has about 700 employees. This means TONS of humor ops! Tons.

For example, the lunch lady sounds like the boss slug lady from Monsters, Inc. and I LOVE her. She is always happy, singing, dancing, making jokes...always entertaining. Today she was singing. I had to laugh and tell her she had a wonderful voice. She cackled at me and said 'Oh, no I don't and I don't care. I'm singing anyway.' Her name is Edna but I'm calling her Roz from now on. She's my favorite. Makes me love lunch time even more.

Check out Roz here ➡️

Today I was in one of the break rooms eating my lunch. I could have joined the class in the cafeteria but I wanted to be alone. I was in one of those moods today. Anyway, it's dark in this room, there's a couch and the TV is always on The Food Network. I sat on the couch, put my feet up, was slurping down leftover pasta and some girl comes and sits next to me. Ok. That's cool. It's a big couch and she wasn't invading my personal space. She put her iPod on, buds in her ears and was content on her own. Awesome! Until....she starts snoring. Seriously? I love naps, too, but really? Snorey McSnoreson finally woke up and left. I had to giggle. I hope her power nap worked.

Needless to say, there is endless entertainment for me at work. It may not be my dream job but it's better entertainment than people watching at the mall.  I mean, I get paid for this. 


November 16, 2013

Girl with a Dog Blog.

 I'm a cat person. Always have been. I had my first cat, Autumn, when I was like 3 years old and have had a cat ever since. Cats are fresh, independent and particular with people. They are very much like me. In fact, I am pretty sure I've been a cat in one of my many past lives. Mew. 

I've never had a dog. My parents had an Irish Setter when I was in 6th grade. Her name was Maggie. I loved her to death...and then she died...but she wasn't mine. She was cool, though. She would follow me everywhere. I'd take off on my bike headed to swim at the waterfalls and Maggie would always be right beside me. I was heart broken when she died and, for the longest time, I wanted another Irish Setter. Then, for the longest time, I wanted a daughter named Maggie. Then, for the longest time, I wanted a pet named Maggie. Yea. She made an impression. 

Anyway. Then there was Sunny. Sunny was NOT mine. For 2.5 years there was Sunny. I hated Sunny. I was always thinking of ways to get rid of Sunny and made a joke out of it. 'Oops! Sunny got stolen by a hawk!'  'Ooops! Sunny got eaten by a bear!' 'Ooops!' You know...that sort of stuff. Sunny wasn't a dog. Sunny was a hound from hell. She bit my dad, Amanda's friends, the ex, the ex's kid, anyone who came to visit, she would try to bite. She tried to bite me once and I punched her in the mouth. Seriously. She was just the worst dog ever and I'm an animal lover! It was hard for me to hate her..but not that hard. I truly believe she was mental and had no training whatsoever. Thank gawd I finally am rid of her...and her owner. 

See....mental. ⬇️

Now I have a dog. Captain Jack Sparrow. Jack, for short. Jack found me. Funny how life works, huh?    As an old love was walking out of my life, a new love came walking in. This love is better though. Jack will always be loyal, he will never cheat on me, he will love me unconditionally and...for always.  He is so happy when I walk through the door, when I take him for walks, it's like I'm giving him the best gift of his life and when I love or snuggle on him...his face shows sheer joy. It's awesome. Jack is the man in my life.

The dog thing is interesting. It's like I became part of a sub culture..this dog club...that I never knew existed. I walk Jack everyday day and see a lot of other dog club people on my outings. We all connect. Jack wants to play friends with everyone...which is weird because he used to hide from everyone when he was homeless. But, now...forget it. He's a social butterfly. If he makes friends with another dog, that dog's human and I step a little deeper in the dog club. We say hello, we let the pups connect, we small talk and then we move on with a little respect and belonging because we 'know'.

I never got this with Sunny because she hated everyone, humans and dogs. No one wanted to play friends with her and I don't blame them. I didn't even want to play friends with her. But, I tried..and that's all that matters. I spoiled her but I spoil Jack more because I love him.

I don't get him though.  How can you be homeless, eating out of trash cans and avoiding humans for at least 4 months and then turn into this lovebug dog? It's crazy. I wish people were more like dogs. Jack knows that I love him and he loves me right back. It doesn't matter what his past was like....he knows his present and future are all he needs. He seems pretty ok with that. 

I'm still getting used to having a dog. The paw in the face at 6am on the weekend is obnoxious. But, I get up and let him out. The barking at people outside and other animals because he wants to play is annoying.  The putting his junk on my feet or sprawling out spread eagle for the world to see is disconcerting. The loud licking is gross. But....I. Getting used to it. It's weird for me to have something that needs so much attention, too. Cats don't give a shit. I can leave Fred for 3 days and he has no clue I was gone for that long. When I return, he's just like 'Hey. What's up?' He doesn't need constant petting, treats, talking, playing, walking, potty breaks. Cats are like whatever. Dogs are constant. That's gonna take some getting used to, too. Because, through it all, I am still an independent soul.

But, Jack is so stinking cute that its worth it. 

It's funny. Whenever I thought about getting a dog, I wanted an Irish Terrier. I researched them. Saw their little attitudes were just like mine and it'd be a perfect fit. Then the ex talked me into getting a Lab.  We wanted to move to the beach and a lab would have been perfect. He wanted black, I wanted chocolate, we probably would have gotten a yellow. Haha! Somehow I ended up with a Boxer mix. But...he's a combination of all colors so I'm ok with that. He also has soulful eyes and flabby jowls. That's cute.

He's a handsome dog and as soon as he has his surgery on Monday! he will be even more handsome. Jack has bilateral cherry eyes. It's a trait of Boxers. There third eyelid gets infected and needs surgery to correct it. That's why I think someone dumped him. It costs a lot to have surgery. But, through the help of some pretty amazing people, he is getting it. I'm also having his balls chopped off because he's a male. Haha! I'm an injured female so this will give me some sort of sick pleasure. reality, he doesn't need to be fathering a tons of opus around town. There's enough of those kind of males around already. Humph.

So, that's my girl with a dog blog. Since I'm starting a new life book, I might as well changed everything up. And...for the assand legs are looking awesome from all this walking! Woot woot! Go dog people. I'm in!