July 2, 2009

My Pee Smells Like Cheerios

Written May 5, 2009

Here's a question for you. Why do overweight people wear sweatshirts that have Disney characters on them? Or Looney Tunes characters? Or any cartoon character, for that matter? There are very few people that I want to see wearing a Minnie Mouse shirt outside of Disneyland.

This girl? Ok!

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This girl? No way!!

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I honestly don't get it. I am pretty certain that Disney isn't the only clothing line that carries XL. Now, don't get all snarky & start accusing me of bashing those who aren't a size 2. Please. I am not a stick figure and I certainly don't agree that a plus sized model should be a size 8. As a matter of fact, I think women should have curves!! I want to go back to the Renaissance Age where curvy women were coveted because that meant they were not only beautiful AND sexy....but wealthy!! Psh! Get your curves on, I say!!

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Just please, please don't plaster them in Disney attire. Oh, and eff you skinny girls!!

Onward, brave readers. hahaha! I know that was rough. I apologize. :)

Have you ever wished that people wouldn’t have told you certain things about themselves? For example: Joe Blow from down the hall comes in and says “Wow, I have this nasty rash on my ass.’ or ‘I brush my teeth once a day.’ or ‘My pee smells like Cheerios.’ These things take up permanent residency in my brain and, try as I might, I can’t get them out. Now every time I see Joe Blow, I think about his rash, teeth & pee. How am I supposed to concentrate on anything else?? I am a very honest & open person but some things are meant to be kept to oneself. There’s my advice for the day. You’re welcome.

Each of us knows a perpetual complainer. Everyone has one in their life, to some extent. You know? That person who makes you cringe whenever they open their mouth. Simply because you know it’s going to suck the life from you. I will be the first to admit I complain about things. However, I usually do it for humor sake. Like when I blog. I complain about everything but it’s simply to make you laugh, not because I am truly distraught over these things. I wonder if they realize they complain or that they drive you insane? I also wonder what they would do if you shot back a complaint every time they did.

‘I hate my job.’ ‘I hate the weather.’
‘I am getting fat.’ ‘I am losing my teeth.’
‘I am bored.’ ‘I am too busy.’
'I am sore.' 'I am sick.'

I think I’ll try that next time the ‘Cereal Complainer’ comes around. I’ll keep you posted but for now I will stop using “quotes”.

So, on a serious note, it has been a rough week for me. I have been attacked for no reason, disappointed, annoyed, hurt & let down. One might assume that I am the common denominator and I just may be. But, the great thing about being an adult is you can choose who you allow in your life. You have the power to deem who is worthy of all the beautiful things you are. I want to live simply, love deeply and laugh often. That’s it. If I feel you are continuously douchey to me, I can deny you access. If I feel you are blaming me for your own misery, I can disappear. If I feel you are not putting forth enough effort to warrant me in your life, I won’t be. If I feel all you do is complain, I will let you go. As an adult, I don't have to be your friend, lover, girlfriend, confidante, playmate, or anything else. I can simply say goodbye.

After all, every goodbye makes the next hello closer.


*Peace.

5 comments:

  1. Rec'd May 6 2009 from Natalie:

    I just want to say thanks for calling out all those fat people walking around in their Disney shirts. They look a HOT MESS! I rep for the big girls all day and they are just a thorn in my side! Also, to whoever made you feel that way, you give me their number! They got some nerve. Who do they think they are?? Pockets full of b!tches. I wish you better days Sunshine. Luv ya! Oh and P.S. - is Joe Blow cute? I may want to date him :) P.S.S. I miss hearing you type so fast! Amay - za - zing.

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  2. Rec'd May 5, 2009 from Cindy:


    Great post Kel. After seeing that picture, I think I will swear off icecream for a couple of weeks!

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  3. Rec'd May 5, 2009 from Jules:

    Hey. I loved the blog but hey its tough to be skinny too. :)

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  4. Rec'd May 5, 2009 from Judy:

    Uh, those fat women??? All i can think of is how uncomfortable they must be! ick! and the first pic?? WHY KELLY, WHY??!!!

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  5. Rec'd May 5, 2009 from Jessica:

    I never realized until you said something, but you are absolutely correct! It is kind of creepy isn't it.

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