I’m taking a risk with to many blogs this week, but I have SO much on my mind!! I’m sorry….I just have to get it the hell out so I can go take a nap in my car.
Don’t you wish it were possible to see yourself as others do? Like your friends? I love how we systematically beat the crap out of ourselves for no apparent reason. ‘I’m too fat.’ ‘I have wrinkles.’ ‘I hate my teeth.’ ‘I have a muffin top.’ Etc. Those are mine but you get the idea. We all do it. If you say you don’t, you are lying. The self deprecating list goes on and on. Then your sweetest, most precious, friend comes along and tells you that you are beautiful. We hem & haw and think she is full of crap because the bad stuff is easier to believe. There is an Irish saying that says “A friend’s eye is a good mirror.” So, what if we…as women, chose to believe, and take to heart, the good things that friends see? Wouldn’t that make for happier, healthier, more secure and confident women? Many people say the only thing you can actually, truly own in life is yourself. Love your imperfections…..and yourself. Own it.
Speaking of looks….I know I’ve said this before but it needs to be reiterated. Because we are so focused on appearances…you know what I love that makes me a total bitch? Total bitch? When I get a random email from Classmates.com and I take the time to go check it out. I love seeing the pretty, snotty, little bitches that grew up to be both fat and slovenly or look like they have never stepped out of their 80 glory day. Evolve bitches! GOD, I love that shit. That’s what they get for being so damn stuck up and mean in high school. Ha! Oh…this is probably why I don’t get invited to the class reunions.
I have been having the baby taunts lately. You know…that painful little tickle inside your belly when you see a cute baby. It kills me. I watched Martian Child and immediately wanted to adopt a quirky little boy. I even went on adoption.com the next day to search. It’s madness. It’s not that I don’t love Amanda; I do more than anything I’ve ever loved before. But, for as long as I remember, I always wanted to be a mom. After I had Amanda I was told by my doctor that it would be better for me to refrain from having more children. Pregnancy really took a hit on my body and my diabetes. At the time, I wasn’t concerned because I was ending a false marriage and I had the most perfect baby of all time. Now…..Amanda will be in high school in 6 months….I’m almost 40…and I’m feeling that niggling, almost to the point of pain, yearning in my soul. I can’t have a baby without doing significant harm to myself and what’s the point of that? Adoption would be difficult because not only am I single, I have health issues. I have been considering being a foster parent but, as a single diabetic, would I be able to handle the issues that come along with that role? Then you have to let them go. So…get close then let go? Ouch. Then I think…oh, I’ll just find a single dad to date. But…there are issues that come along with that, too. So…will any of my friends please have a baby and let me be the Godmother? Come on. I’m good. Kids love me!
I have found a better bra and it lives at The Gap. I have always been a Victoria Secret’s girl. They have the sexiest &/or cutest bra & panty collections. Who doesn’t want to look cute for her man….especially a new one? Anyway, while I think they are cute…they tend to become uncomfortable. Last weekend I bought a bra at The Gap. I needed a new cream color one because the strap of my VS one kept falling down. It was driving me crazy and there was no way to tighten it. I ran into The Gap and there it was….hanging on the sale rack, no less. I figured…why not? It will be some time before I hit the mall. Now….I am in love. I plan on going back and buying one in every color. It has got to be the most comfortable thing my boobs have ever experienced! Try it….you’ll like it.
I have to go to my OBGYN tomorrow for my yearly. First, I’m not even having sex. If it weren’t for my stupid period, I wouldn’t even need birth control. Who can’t wait for menopause raise their hands?!?! Since I’m not having sex, it seems I should be slightly excited that someone is actually looking at my poonani. But…I’m not. This has got to be the most embarrassing situation a woman could ever be in. At least one of the most. I’m sure that when I have to start having my boob smushed between two metal plates, I won’t be happy either. Isn’t enough that we have our periods? Do we seriously have to do all this other crap, too? UGH! On one hand being a woman is wonderful. Spas, makeup, smelly body wash, shoes, purses…on the other hand…birth, OBGYN’s, menstrual cycle, cramps, mammograms. There should be a day for just women where all the good things are free. Like….in April because it’s spring and on a Wednesday because it starts with W. It could be called Women’s Wednesday. All the yummy stuff would be free for the entire day. There should even be gifts that are given. That’s what I think.
Why do all the cute shoes hurt your feet? Many of you know I just bought my all time favorite shoes. They are cream with a red heel and strap. They are also covered with springtime flowers and bugs of every color. I freaking loved them at first glace. They also look so cute on me. This is my 2nd time wearing them. A few more times will break them in but the few first times are murder. You want to forget all your life troubles? Wear a pair of shoes that kill your feet for 10 hours. Why can’t they just come broken in and comfy? Wouldn’t that also make the world a better place? Damn. I have 5 more hours to go.
Now I feel like I should list some of my female favorite things. Just because I have nothing to do today and maybe you will agree or this will tempt you into trying.
The Gap. Introducing my new favorite bra.
Russell Stover Sugar Free NougieNuttyChew. These + diabetic = love.
Tutti Dolci Lip Gloss. Color without the cake. Less is more ladies.
Google. Allows you to be all knowing….as long as you are on the internet.
Simply Natural Organic Tomato and Basil. No pic but this shit ROCKS!
Straw Hats. I keep looking for a unique and very ‘Kelly’ like one.
Skinny 3-Pump Vanilla Lattes. Always loyal…always true..so I had to.
Lastly….Daisies. They are happy flowers and spring is coming.
And in case I forgot to tell you - I think you are beautiful. Have a great weekend and celebrate being a female.