June 30, 2009

Rubbish!

March 23, 2007

Amanda gave me the greatest compliment last night. I had to share. She told me that I was a great mom and a great person. Awww! How flipping cute is she? My cup runneth over.... I'll have to remember this heart bursting moment when she's 16 and telling me she hates me because I've ruined her life.

I have been on an emotional rollercoaster this entire week. The whole week. In it's entirety. From Monday to Friday. I have cried or at least have teared up every day. I don't have my period. I'm definitely not pregnant. Psh. I told Bill this morning that I think I'm turning into a girl. Holy jaysus. I don't want to be a girl!! What the heck is wrong with me?

I have 15,000 miles on my car. I got this car somewhere around June, 2006. Not even a year ago. She's (yes, she's a she) really taking a beaten. I need a job that's nearby. Stupid Henderson. Do you name your cars? I do. I know whether they are male or female. I typically name them based on their color. My truck was a boy and just blue. That was his name. My Honda is a girl and taffeta white. Her name is Taffy. I had a Sunbird whose name was electric blue....boy. It was the 80's so Electric Blue fit. I had a 300Z that was artic blue....boy. His name was..yipe...Polar. Anyway, you get the picture. Am I the only dork that does this?

Why is it that every time you see or speak to an ex...you walk away with the impression that their life is wonderful? Especially when you're thinking yours needs a little help. I was engaged to Jim many, many moons ago. I left him to move to Vegas. Life goes on. Marriage, kids...for me, divorce. Complete normalcy. So, I called him on the way home from work last night because I was worried about him. I'm not saying I was expecting conversation with Professor Doom. Jim's not like that. Jim always has had the ability to make me feel good about myself. Yet, I hung up and burst into tears. Yea, the girl thing again. I have to thank Jenna for making me realize that life is not perfect. For anyone. Especially an ex. Just like me, they have issues to deal with too. Sometimes I forget that.

I'm not making any frigging sense today. Not that I make sense any other day but today I'm just rambling on for the sake of rambling. I've had a bad week.

*Peace.

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