June 30, 2009

Anonymity

October 5, 2007

Has it escaped nearly everyone's attention that most people and most company's HAVE caller id? Seriously. I must get 100 idiots a day that call work, wait until I see the id, answer, then hang up. Then they have the audacity to call back and ask for someone or ask a question. I thought you were stupid the first time you called and hung up. Now I think you're totally ignorant for calling again. I wish, just once, I could say something. I don't know what, just something to let them know I know. Like…'Oh, hey, moron. I just saw you called. Did you lose your voice? Did you forget the English language? Did Aliens swoop down at that exact moment and disconnect the phone? What?' Same thing with my mobile. I see that you are calling! I see it!! On what planet does the anonymity of a phone call still exist?? Wise up, people!

There are some movies that just never cease to be funny. Airplane or The Jerk are both prime examples of this statement. They crack me up regardless of how often I have seen them, my mood, my age, it doesn't matter. Funny is funny. When I'm 80, I will still be laughing whenever I see a clip or watch the entire film. Amanda & I saw a preview for Airplane on DVD. Special edition…ooooh! They showed the best moments, of course, during the 5 seconds they allotted for their commercial. Here are my two all time favorites:

Roger Murdock: We have clearance, Clarence.Captain Oveur: Roger, Roger. What's our vector, Victor?

~AND~

Steve McCroskey: Johnny, what can you make out of this?[Hands him the weather briefing]Johnny: This? Why, I can make a hat or a brooch or a pterodactyl...

CRACKS ME UP!! Every single time! Because I mentioned it, I have to give you my favorite two moments from The Jerk:

Navin R. Johnson: He hates these cans! Stay away from the cans!

~AND~

Navin R. Johnson: I don't need anything except this. And that's it and that's the only thing I need, is this. I don't need this or this. Just this ashtray. And this paddle game, the ashtray and the paddle game and that's all I need. And this remote control. The ashtray, the paddle game, and the remote control, and that's all I need. And these matches. The ashtray, and these matches, and the remote control and the paddle ball. And this lamp. The ashtray, this paddle game and the remote control and the lamp and that's all I need. And that's all I need too. I don't need one other thing, not one - I need this. The paddle game, and the chair, and the remote control, and the matches, for sure. And this. And that's all I need. The ashtray, the remote control, the paddle game, this magazine and the chair.

I'm laughing right now and I'm not even watching it! Hahaha! What movie will forever make you laugh and what is your favorite moment of that movie?

You know what I forgot that I loved? Dough balls. When I was young, white bread and dough balls were the shit. Right now I am eating white bread which is the absolute best to make dough balls with. This is the first time, in a long time, that I've bought white bread. I usually try to remain healthy and buy whole wheat or 7 grain. Anyway, Amanda wanted white. Wonder white. I have to teach her the dough ball thing. Eat the crust first, tear a piece off and roll into a mushy ball. Yum. Maybe she already knows this trick…I Wonder.

You know what I remembered that I hate? Liars. I don't get them. It's so much easier to tell the truth. Lying is the hard route to take, I think. You have to remember what you lied about, offer up excuses, etc, etc. Plus you lose my respect. The kicker is having someone lie to you when you already know the truth. Awkward! Does the person being lied to say 'Uh, hey, yea, liar? You're full of shite.' Eh, sometimes I do, other times I let them dig their hole of deceit. At least I know where I stand with them and what sort of chap they are, and that's good. Then you have the people who lie about stupid shit. Why? Do you think it makes you a better person? Do you think it makes you sound superior? Do you think people care enough either way? Nope, don't get liars. Not at all. But anyway, we are on to you. Know that. Know that we know you are a freaking lying piece of crap. Eventually, if not now, you will be called out on it. So, again, wise up people.

I LOVE Starbuck's. Most of you know this but I love it even more now. Yesterday morning not only did my favorite Starbuck's grandma give me a 'buy one get one free coupon' for this weekend, she gave me a free iTunes download! You can get a free song DAILY! Hoorah! Coffee & tunes! It doesn't get much better than that! I got KT Tunstall's One Day. Ooooh, I wish I could go to Starbuck's every day! I wish I had a million dollars so I could get my daily caffeine and my daily music fix. Life is good. ;)

Happy Birthday, George!!

Cheers!

*Peace.

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